Friday, February 20, 2015

A worldwide web of friendship

It began in 1997, just after I’d been made redundant from the library and was officially early-retired. Enjoying my new-found leisure, I treated myself to a day trip to the annual Christian Resources Exhibition at the National Exhibition Centre in Birmingham. There I came across a stand run by a new organisation, Christians On The Internet (always known as COIN) through which I was introduced to the concept of mailing lists and began to discover how people I’d never met could become friends.

The next step came three years later, when I first started to suggest to DH that we might look at buying a little cottage in France. As part of my research I joined a couple of French-interest online forums, where helpful strangers offered me a lot of useful advice and where in turn I could eventually share the fruits of my own experience. A recurrence of breast cancer in 2005 brought me on to a couple of support forums where I received a huge amount of help and kindness and it was here first that forum members really began to become friends. Later I had the same experience on other small and friendly forums.

It was on a French-interest forum that I stumbled across my first blog, French Leave (now sadly defunct) and I was hooked. I rapidly discovered more and more blogs, by no means all writing about France, and eventually began to be nagged by the thought that perhaps this was something I too could attempt.

Finally, four years ago today, I took the plunge and launched my first baby post into the ether, helped by an understanding blogger who had kindly offered to add my blog to her blog roll, if I ever summoned up the courage to start one. To my surprise a tiny trickle of comments came in, including one from the writer of the marvellous blog that had first whetted my appetite. She has encouraged me every step of the way since and pointed me in the direction of many other wonderful blogs. Thanks, Helen.

The four years since that first tentative post have been deeply enjoyable and satisfying and my web of online friends has become truly worldwide. Day by day I’m offered fascinating glimpses of life throughout Europe, north and central America, Australia and New Zealand and I never cease to marvel that my own blog has visitors from all over the world.

When I at last gave in and joined Facebook last year, I found many of my virtual (but nonetheless very real) friends from every medium already there to greet me – another strand in a beautiful and rewarding web of friendship that has enriched my life immeasurably. I’ve even managed to meet a few of them in person and would love to meet more. Just imagine the world tour I could make…

Image via Google

P.S. This post will be published while I’m away on a weekend family visit, so there will be no replies until I’m home again. 

46 comments:

  1. Happy Fourth Bloggiversary, Perpetua. I love your picture of the World Wide Web, and I for one am very glad you made this foray into the world of blog. Thank you for your encouragement and help with my blog over the years - not long until my fourth anniversary too. Have a lovely weekend with family.

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    1. Thanks, Patricia. It;'s a great image, isn't it? It's been a pleasure getting to know you and help out where I can and I can't believe how quickly those four years have flown. The weekend was super, thanks - of which more anon....

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  2. Isn't blogging amazing? I loved reading about you journey into making contact through the internet. Blogging is a real gift. I think it saved my sanity after I lost my daughter. I have made so many friends via blogging. I love reading the daily updates on Facebook by my blogging friends. I guess it all sounds a bit crazy, but I have the best friends that I have never met. We could have a wonderful world tour indeed. When are you coming to visit? I'm serious. I'd love to host your visit. In the meantime, keep on blogging.

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    1. Oh, it is, Sally, and it's something I'd never have believed if someone had told me before I started. I really love blogging and the kindness and support of that bit of the blogging community it's been my good fortune to get to know. Yes, they really are the best friends we've never met. I would love to think I could come to visit one day and would never rule out the possibility.

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  3. Like youş I started out wıth forums...general interest onesş and then because we moved around Turkey a fair bıt I joined forums for the local areas through whıch I made frıends, many of whom I got to know ın person. Then came Facebook and blogging, and so the friendships continue to grow. Liviıng ın an isolated place, the ınternet becomes a lifeline, and you never feel alone.

    Happy 4th Anniversary...can't quite believe ıt's four years!

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    1. Thanks, Ayak. I can't really believe it either. :-) Yours was the first blog Helen recommended to me and it's been lovely getting to know you and Mr A over the years. I can imagine the lifeline the internet provides for you in your situation and I too love the fact that I can keep in touch with my family and friends wherever I happen to be.

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  4. I've enjoyed meeting you in this blog-iverse. Happy anniversary.

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    1. Thanks, Claudia. The enjoyment is mutual. :-)

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  5. Congratulations Perpetua, on your blog's fourth birthday & thank you for sharing how you first came to start blogging. I always enjoy your posts & your blog has been a wonderful way to remain in touch, having not seen you in person since your last locum stint in Prague in the Autumn of 2011.

    Unlike you, I just fell into blogging, initially as way of keeping in touch with friends, family & former parishioners after moving to Prague, & helped by Sybille already having bought me my own domain. Blogging is great fun though also hard work, as many who start, don't even reach a first birthday. So congratulations once more, on reaching birthday number four.

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    1. Thanks, Ricky. I can hardly believe it's so long since I started and would never have imagined back then that I would still be blogging four years later and enjoying it so much. I love the way it keeps me in touch with people like you, whom I already know, and helps me get to know so many new people.

      I know other bloggers who began as you did, finding blogging a wonderful tool for maintaining contact with people after a move abroad. But it doesn't happen without the work involved in planning and writing posts and a bit of inspiration helps too. :-)

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  6. Happy Bloggiversay! Four years and counting! I don't know what we'd do without the internet nowadays, I really don't. Whatever people say, it's a fantastic tool to keep in touch with others, and just communicate. Reaching out is one of the things we humans do best. :)

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    1. Thanks, Sarah. I too can't imagine life without the internet now, yet it's all happened so quickly. The online world has its downsides, but used properly it is truly life-enhancing. I've learned so much from all the people I've come to know this way.

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  7. Four years, still blogging and making friends worldwide is a true testament to the blogosphere.
    I have been trying to remember how it all began for me - my son had a poetry blog which I would look at, and then I discovered that I could click on to his followers which whetted my appetite and interest for more.
    I know that you have been a great blog friend to many Perpetua, helping them out in their hour of need when they encounter problems with blogger.

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    1. It is indeed, Rosemary, and I hope to go on doing both for many years to come.
      How interesting that you first discovered blogging through your son's blog and then explored further until you started your own beautiful blog. I think we all have stories to tell about how we came to blog.
      As for helping out, I'm happy to share my little stock of hard-won knowledge and experience when I can. :-)

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  8. Hari OM
    Oh you remind me that the second anniversary of the launch of the 'Menomoirs' is imminent - a lot has happened in that time, as it has for you. Blogging began as a 'safety valve' for a brain that was overloading... now I cannot quite imagine a day without it. Having been able to connect with a few blogpals in the flesh, I know that it is indeed a worthwhile hobby!!!

    Congrats on your 4th year Perpetua and may there be many more. YAM xx

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    1. Thanks, Yam. It's amazing how quickly the time has passed as you obviously know from your own experience. Unlike you, I've never tried to blog daily or even every other day, but really enjoy doing so when inspiration strikes or I have news to share. That's the beauty of blogging. It can be whatever we want to make it. :-)

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  9. When you make that worldwide tour, Perpetua, you must stop for a visit to the Cutoff. It would delight me beyond what words could say.
    What a delight post you have written here, that could very well be my own, or, I suspect that of many bloggers. You've done it so well, dear one, and wrapped it up nicely. I always look forward to opening up a post from you, knowing I will be calmed, learn something, be inspired; you are my grace notes in time.

    It was actually one of my blogging friends who encouraged me to go on FB, where I also found you and others - and round and round this circle goes. Life is good.

    Congratulations on your anniversary, Perpetua. Here's to many more.

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    1. Penny, I can promise you that if I ever manage to make that tour, the Cutoff will be definitely be on the list of stopping places. :-)
      I love the similarities and differences between us all in this worldwide blogging community. We share a great deal and yet each has his or her own story to tell of how the blogging journey began for them. I think this is what makes blogs and blogging so endlessly fascinating and I too have learned so much from you and my other blog friends. The enjoyable little exchanges on FB are just the icing on the cake!

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  10. The blogging world has been such an exciting one to explore, and I cant agree with you more about the support our "community" has provided. I love reading what our friends across the world are up to. You have been a wonderful link for me, to many others around the world.....and I really hope we get to meet up in person at some stage. Congratulations on this milestone...looking forward to much more from Perpetua in Transit. Jxxxx

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    1. Thanks, Janice, and I too really hope we get to meet one day. At least we're in the same country for part of the time, which is a step in the right direction. :-) You and I have both has recent personal experience of the wonderful support and encouragement that blog friends can offer when life hits us over the head with something hard and I agree completely that it's such fun to read what other bloggers are up to.

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  11. And long may you continue. I still have a hope that we will meet up in the Highlands one day.

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    1. Thanks, BtoB, I think of you each time we head up the A9 and get close to Inverness. Perhaps one day our visits will overlap...

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  12. It really is wonderful, isn't it? I have met many like-minded souls and learned a lot about places and things I might never have experienced otherwise. I'm so very glad to have 'met' you in the ether!

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    1. It really is and I'm profoundly grateful to have been introduced to the world of blogging and to have met you and so many others. My mind and heart are constantly stretched by what I read in your wonderful blogs.

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  13. I hope you're having a wonderful weekend with your family, Perpetua! It really is like a worldwide web of friendship, isn't it? I'm so glad you decided to start blogging. Happy blogiversary!

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    1. Thanks, Kristie. I had a really super weekend (of which more anon) and am late with my replies to everyone's comments. I'm so glad I came across your blog and added another knitterly strand to my friendship web. :-)

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  14. A lovely post, as always, Perpetua and I couldn't agree more with your sentiments. Moving away from the physical closeness of many real friends, I am delighted to have made and met so many good virtual friends on the web... yourself included of course! Here's to the next four years of friendship in blog land with always the tantalising possibility of a real life meeting. Axxx

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    1. Thanks, Annie. Yours was one of the first blogs I found after starting my own (via a comment you made on Ayak's blog) and I remember thinking what a wonderful way for you to keep in touch with the people you'd left behind in the UK. Now of course I know what a wonderful way it is to make new friends too and I would love to think a real life meeting might be on the cards. :-)

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  15. Four years already...and more power to your blogging elbow for the years to come!

    Isn't it amazing how much we learn about other people's way of living, the thoughts and opinions that are never reflected in the mainstream press - the sheer goodness of the majority of people, some of whom become our friends through the exchanges that the internet has made possible, hearts and minds opened by means of what is transmitted by a fibre optic cable...

    I'm so glad you started to blog....not just for the pleasure your posts give me, great though that is but also for the doors your blog has opened for me...and I remain grateful for the help you and Ayak have given me over the years on the nuts and bolts of Blogger and Wordpress - transforming the reaction to a glitch from one of throwing heavy objects and boiling my head to one of e mailing one of you with a cry for help - never unanswered.

    Wouldn't your world trip be a gas!

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    1. Thanks, Helen. It's been so enjoyable and satisfying so far that i can't see myself giving up blogging anytime soon.

      You are so right about the alternative view of the world which ther internet - and blogging in particular - gives us. We read about the day to day reality of life in different parts of the world and can comment and converse about what we read, as we learn to know the person behind the words.

      I'm grateful that your first blog inspired me to start my own and persevere through the initial steep learning curve and subsequent technical problems and am glad that what I've managed to learn has been helpful to you from time to time. What's the point of knowledge if we can't share it?

      As for the world trip, if it were ever to materialise, Costa Rica would be high on the itinerary. :-)

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  16. I started out by 'dipping my toes in' after reading people's blogs. I love the community of blogging friends - the diversity is just like all the beautiful colours blended together in your picture. Ten years ago must have been an anxious time for you - so glad you came through OK. The nursing staff at the Lingen Davies Centre are so caring and lovely. Thank you for your lovely blogs Perpetua.

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    1. Another toe in the water person, Molly. :-) Isn't it wonderful that we can get to know each other in this way, reaching out round the world to other like-minded people? Mind you, you're just down the road from me and we really must meet up sometime soon. :-)

      Yes, the recurrence was an awful shock, but I had wonderful treatment in Oxford that time (Shrewsbury was where I was treated the first time) and feel very fortunate to still be fit and well.

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  17. As I know you know we are two day apart blog twins, and I echo your every word.

    I hope you have a lovely weekend x

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    1. I had a wonderful weekend, thanks. Yes, your blog started right after mine, though we didn't bump into each other for a while after that. I'm glad we eventually did. :)

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  18. A special post for me this week. Years ago, when I had my first computer I joined a Chat room [and this was a lovely place] where I made real friends in the UK. One lady who was on the same wave-length as I was almost wheel chair bound and over the years I kept in touch. When her dear husband died I made a special effort to write to her monthly. The past Christmas was the first time I had no card from her, which sent me wondering. Early this week another lady who visited the Chat Room [now they are all closed because some were evidently 'undesirable'] emailed me with the news of the death of this distant friend.
    Blogging is a lovely way of reaching out to folk, folk with whom we would never otherwise know the existence of.
    Enjoy your weekend away:)

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    1. That is such a touching story, Shirley. I'm sorry for the loss of your faraway friend and can imagine how much your friendship and real efforts to stay in touch must have meant to her. This gives the lie to those who dismiss online or postal friendships as somehow not real, just because we've never actually been in the same room together. We can learn so much about people from their written words over time, as I've found in my years online and in particular my years as a blogger. How else could you and I know each other at the opposite sides of the world?

      PS The weekend was lovely, thanks. :-)

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  19. Congratulations, Miss P! I've been following you since I started blogging, a year after you...you were one of the first followers on my blog, and I think you pointed Helen my way shortly afterwards :-)
    Like you, I love the warmth and friendship of the blogging world - the support from people I had never met yet felt I know so well when times were tough last year was instrumental in getting back on my feet. I often dream of an international blogging convention when we could all meet up...

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    1. Thanks, MM. I bless the day I stumbled across your blog and found my day filled with laughter. I think Helen found you because I immediately put your blog on my blog-roll and she used that as a recommendation. :-)
      I can well imagine how much you appreciated the friendship of bloggers last year. We really do care what happens to the bloggers we read and I know how much I've been helped and supported at times by my blog friends.
      That international blogging convention would be amazing - full of fun and laughter and recognition. :-)

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  20. Hello Perpetua,

    Four years and still going strong. Congratulations on reaching this blogging milestone and may you have many, many happy returns!

    We can echo what many of the earlier commentators have said. You have offered the hand of friendship to so many over these four years and have taken us in to your warm and caring world. Your intelligent, thoughtful and, often, amusing posts have delighted us and have also made us think. Yours is a unique voice which makes Blogtopia so much richer and so much more friendly.

    We have shared with you in good times and in bad. You have visited our own blog with comments which always show a keen concern and interest. Although miles may separate us, we are together at the touch of a screen. We enjoy travelling along with you and look forward to many more adventures together.

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    1. Thank you, Jane and Lance. It's been a very enjoyable journey so far and I hope to continue it for a long time yet. It has been truly life-changing to discover how real are the friendships which can develop through blogging. Once that happens it seems only natural to reach out and draw in others wherever possible. Every blog I read is unique and different and I love the variety of voices and outlooks I find.

      Your own blog gives me a great deal of enjoyment and stretches my perceptions - especially artistic - and I've always been glad we came across each other in this online world and made that first important connection.

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  21. So true, P. I never thought I’d connect with so many other people and make friends in places I’ll never see.

    Wouldn’t that world tour be wonderful? Meeting one blogger after another on home ground and finally learning if the virtual reality bears any relation to the real one.

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    1. I don't think any of us could have imagined what we would find when we first started to blog, Friko. A true voyage of discovery.

      The world tour would be a dream come true and I don't think I would find too much of a mismatch between the virtual and the real-life. Over the years we really do get a good picture of those whose blogs we read.

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  22. I couldn't agree with you more about the joy of meeting so many wonderful people from all over the world! I have tried to explain to non-blogging friends how I have formed relationships with people I have never met, yet I don't consider strangers--not for one minute! I get some funny looks and usually just stop trying to explain what even I have a hard time understanding. I think of each one, and that includes you, dear Perpetua, as a gift in my life! And a very happy blogging anniversary to you! ox

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    1. Thanks, Debra. Yes, it's hard to describe to a non-blogger both the enjoyable and addictive nature of blogging and the very real friendships we make through it. I know DS thinks it's odd. :-) But we bloggers know that even if we can't put it easily into words, blogging is a truly life-enhancing activity. I have learned so much from reading blogs, including your fascinating history posts and really love the human interconnectedness created by blogging.

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  23. As the daughter of an embroiderer, it occurs to me that your photo of the Web would be wonderful in textiles!
    Well, I suppose we have become old hands in the blogosphere. What a rewarding journey it has been. Ten years ago I simply couldn't see the point of broadcasting one's personal goings-on via a 'web-log'. Now, I learn so much from the blogs of others and have made friendships which certainly feel real and supportive.
    Talking of which, we are still hoping that you will drop by for a cuppa or more one day, when you are up to travelling north again!

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    1. I'm the daughter of an embroiderer too, but that thought just hadn't occurred to me, though you're right, of course.
      Yes, it's odd to think of ourselves as old hands, but compared to many who start and stop blogging very quickly, I suppose we are. I'm not sure I'd discovered blogs 10 years ago and when I did I was more fascinated than puzzled by them, though I had no thought of starting my own back then. I'm so glad I did or we wouldn't have 'met'. Now it's just a case of making the plans to do it face to face. :)

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